Daily Verse September 30, 2010

Instruction in Wisdom
1 Davidic. Do not be agitated by evildoers; do not envy those who do wrong.

2 For they wither quickly like grass and wilt like tender green plants.

3 Trust in the Lord and do what is good;dwell in the land and live securely.

4 Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires.

5 Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act,

6 making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday.

7 Be silent before the Lord and wait expectantly for Him;do not be agitated by one who prospers in his way, by the man who carries out evil plans.

8 Refrain from anger and give up your rage; do not be agitated—it can only bring harm.

9 For evildoers will be destroyed, but those who put their hope in the Lord will inherit the land.

10 A little while, and the wicked will be no more; though you look for him, he will not be there.

11 But the humble will inherit the landand will enjoy abundant prosperity.

12 The wicked schemes against the righteous and gnashes his teeth at him.

13 The Lord laughs at himbecause He sees that his day is coming.

14 The wicked have drawn the sword and strung the bow to bring down the afflicted and needy and to slaughter those whose way is upright.

15 Their swords will enter their own hearts, and their bows will be broken.

16 Better the little that the righteous man has than the abundance of many wicked people.

17 For the arms of the wicked will be broken,but the Lord supports the righteous.

18 The Lord watches over the blameless all their days, and their inheritance will last forever.

19 They will not be disgraced in times of adversity; they will be satisfied in days of hunger.

20 But the wicked will perish; the Lord’s enemies, like the glory of the pastures, will fade away— they will fade away like smoke.

21 The wicked borrows and does not repay, but the righteous is gracious and giving.

22 Those who are blessed by Him will inherit the land,but those cursed by Him will be destroyed.

23 A man’s steps are established by the Lord, and He takes pleasure in his way.

24 Though he falls, he will not be overwhelmed, because the Lord holds his hand.

25 I have been young and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous abandoned or his children begging bread.

26 He is always generous, always lending, and his children are a blessing.

27 Turn away from evil and do what is good, and dwell there forever.

28 For the Lord loves justice and will not abandon His faithful ones.They are kept safe forever, but the children of the wicked will be destroyed.

29 The righteous will inherit the landand dwell in it permanently.

30 The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom; his tongue speaks what is just.

31 The instruction of his God is in his heart; his steps do not falter.

32 The wicked lies in wait for the righteous and seeks to kill him;

33 the Lord will not leave him in his handor allow him to be condemned when he is judged.

34 Wait for the Lord and keep His way, and He will exalt you to inherit the land. You will watch when the wicked are destroyed.

35 I have seen a wicked, violent man well-rooted like a flourishing native tree.

36 Then I passed by and noticed he was gone; I searched for him, but he could not be found.

37 Watch the blameless and observe the upright, for the man of peace will have a future.

38 But transgressors will all be eliminated; the future of the wicked will be destroyed.

39 The salvation of the righteous is from the Lord, their refuge in a time of distress.

40 The Lord helps and delivers them; He will deliver them from the wicked and will save them because they take refuge in Him.
(Psalm 37, HCSB)

Todays Fun

Church Football
Quarterback Sneak - Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.

Draw Play - What many children do with the bulletin during worship.

Halftime - The period between Sunday School and worship when many choose to leave

Benchwarmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit.

Backfield-in-Motion - Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service.

Staying in the Pocket - What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord's work.

Two-minute Warning - The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up your children and belongings.

Instant Replay - The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week's illustrations.

Sudden Death - What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes "overtime".

Trap - You're called on to pray and are asleep.

End Run - Getting out of church quick, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.

Flex Defense - The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.

Halfback Option - The decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for the evening service.

Blitz - The rush for the restaurants following the closing prayer.
(Crosswalk.com)

Daily Verse September 16, 2010

For the director of music. To [the tune of] "The Death of the Son." A psalm of David.
1 I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonders. 2 I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High. 3 My enemies turn back; they stumble and perish before you. 4 For you have upheld my right and my cause; you have sat on your throne, judging righteously. 5 You have rebuked the nations and destroyed the wicked; you have blotted out their name for ever and ever. 6 Endless ruin has overtaken the enemy, you have uprooted their cities; even the memory of them has perished. 7 The LORD reigns forever; he has established his throne for judgment. 8 He will judge the world in righteousness; he will govern the peoples with justice. 9 The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. 10 Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you. 11 Sing praises to the LORD, enthroned in Zion; proclaim among the nations what he has done. 12 For he who avenges blood remembers; he does not ignore the cry of the afflicted. 13 O LORD, see how my enemies persecute me! Have mercy and lift me up from the gates of death, 14 that I may declare your praises in the gates of the Daughter of Zion and there rejoice in your salvation. 15 The nations have fallen into the pit they have dug; their feet are caught in the net they have hidden. 16 The LORD is known by his justice; the wicked are ensnared by the work of their hands. "Higgaion." "Selah" 17 The wicked return to the grave, all the nations that forget God. 18 But the needy will not always be forgotten, nor the hope of the afflicted ever perish. 19 Arise, O LORD, let not man triumph; let the nations be judged in your presence. 20 Strike them with terror, O LORD; let the nations know they are but men. "Selah" (Psalm 9, NIV)

Thursday Fun

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

Golden Retriever: The sun is shining. The day is young. We've got our whole lives ahead of us. And you're inside worrying about a stupid, burned-out light bulb?

Border Collie: Just one. Not only that, but I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp!

Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

Rottweiler: Go Ahead! Make me!

Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. What are servants for?

Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I?

Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.

Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.

Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there...

Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

Australian Shepherd: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?

Daily Verse September 2, 2010

… There will be a time of distress such as has not happened from the beginning of nations until then. But at that time your people—everyone whose name is found written in the book—will be delivered.(Daniel 12:1, NIV)

The time to come when the end of days is upon us will not be like anything we can imagine. 21 For then there will be great distress, unequaled from the beginning of the world until now--and never to be equaled again. (Matthew 24:21, NIV)

19 because those will be days of distress unequaled from the beginning, when God created the world,1 until now--and never to be equaled again. (Mark 13:19, NIV)

18 Then there came flashes of lightning, rumblings, peals of thunder and a severe earthquake. No earthquake like it has ever occurred since man has been on earth, so tremendous was the quake. (Revelation 16:18, NIV)

Those of us that have placed our faith in Jesus have been written into his book.
20 However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven." (Luke 10:20, NIV)

5 He who overcomes will, like them, be dressed in white. I will never blot out his name from the book of life, but will acknowledge his name before my Father and his angels. (Revelation 3:5, NIV)

Thursday Fun

Enter the Kingdom of Heaven
A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket, and jeans.
Saint Peter addresses this guy, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?"
The guy replies, "I'm Joe Cohen, taxi-driver, of Noo Yawk City."
Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi-driver, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
The taxi-driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff, and it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am Joseph Snow, pastor of Saint Mary's for the last forty-three years."
Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
"Just a minute," says the minister. "That man was a taxi-driver and he gets a silken robe and golden staff.
How can this be?"
"Up here, we work by results," says Saint Peter. "While you preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed."

Daily Verse August 26, 2010

2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. 3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 4 God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day. 6 And God said, “Let there be an expanse between the waters to separate water from water.” 7 So God made the expanse and separated the water under the expanse from the water above it. And it was so. 8 God called the expanse “sky.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day. 9 And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. 10 God called the dry ground “land,” and the gathered waters he called “seas.” And God saw that it was good. 11 Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. 12 The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. 13 And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day. 14 And God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth.” And it was so. 16 God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. 17 God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, 18 to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day. 20 And God said, “Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky.” 21 So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living and moving thing with which the water teems, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. 22 God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth.” 23 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fifth day. 24 And God said, “Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind.” And it was so. 25 God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. 26 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. 28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” 29 Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. 30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food.” And it was so. 31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day. (Genesis 1: 2-31, NIV)

Have you ever notice the correlation of the days in the creation story. I was watching a small lecture when they pointed this out, and how many times do we read it and not notice. I thought this was very interesting.


Day 1 – Let there be Light
Day 4 – Sun, Moon, and Stars
Day 2 – Sky and Water
Day 5 – Birds and Winged creatures and all creatures in the water
Day 3 – Land and vegetation
Day 6 - livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals and man

Today’s Funny

Jennifer had applied for a job and when she returned home, her mother asked how the interview went.

"Pretty good, I think," replied Jennifer, "but if I go to work there I won't get a vacation until I'm married."

Her mother, of course, had never heard of such a thing. "Is that what they told you?"

"No",replied Jennifer, "but right on the application it said 'vacation time may notbe taken until you've had your First Anniversary.'"

Daily Verse August 19, 2010

19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. 21 Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.

22 Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23 Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24 and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25 But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it–he will be blessed in what he does.

26 If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. 27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

(James 1: 19-27, NIV)

Today’s Fun

Good Excuses’

Everybody has a good excuse for not attending church. If you take those excuses and apply them to other things we do (or don't do), like eating, they might look like this list:

1. I was forced to eat as a child.

2. People who eat all the time are hypocrites; they aren't really hungry.

3. There are so many different kinds of food, I can't decide what to eat.

4. I used to eat, but I got bored and stopped.

5. I only eat on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.

6. None of my friends will eat with me.

7. I'll start eating when I get older.

8. I don't really have time to eat.

9. I don't believe that eating does anybody any good. It's just a crutch.

10. Restaurants and grocery stores are only after your money.

Daily Verse August 12, 2010 w/ Thursday Fun

7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double‑minded.9 Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. 11 Brothers, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against his brother or judges him speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it. 12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you–who are you to judge your neighbor?

(James 4: 7-12, NIV)

Your Fun for the Day

A small town had four churches Presbyterian, Methodist, Catholic and Baptist.

All four had a serious problem with squirrels in the church. Each church in its own fashion had a meeting to deal with the problem.

The Presbyterians decided that it was predestined that squirrels be in the church and that they would just have to live with them.

The Methodists decided they should deal with the squirrels lovingly in the style of Charles Wesley. They humanely trapped them and released them in a park at the edge of town. Within 3 days, they were all back in the church.

The Catholics also humanely trapped them and attempted to teach them the "rhythm" method which of course did not work.

The Baptists had the best solution. They voted the squirrels in as members Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.

Daily Verse August 5, 2010 w/ Thursday Fun

But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. They are reborn—not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God. (John 1:12-13, NLT)

All who welcome Jesus Christ as Lord of their lives are reborn spiritually, receiving new life from God. Through faith in Christ, this new birth changes us from the inside out—rearranging our attitudes, desires, and motives. Being born makes you physically alive and places you in your parents’ family. Being born of God makes you spiritually alive and puts you in God’s family. Have you asked Christ to make you a new person? This fresh start in life is available to all who believe in Christ. (NLT Life Application Bible)

Todays Fun Story

Life Explained (from Crosswalk.com)

On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?" So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?" And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said:"That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?" And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years." But man said:"Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.
For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
http://www.crosswalk.com/fun/mind-benders/1358009/